Sunday, February 24, 2008

If Both of Us Have Genital Herpes - Can we make things worse?

Hi,

I am a single female (almost 50) who was diagnosed with H about 2 years ago. I am interested in becoming intimate with a man who was diagnosed about 4 years ago. He is very afraid to get close because he says he might hurt me. I have tried to find something about two people with herpes who become intimate. Can you please tell me where I can read an article or find some information about this? Can we hurt each other if both of us have genital herpes? I thought I was taking this in stride though I was devastated at first and depressed too. I had sex with a good friend who wasn't honest with me. The relationship ended because of it. Now I have met someone new. I appreciate your input on this issue.

Thank you,

One of Two with H


Dear One of Two with H:

If you BOTH already have HSV2, then you cannot re-infect each other. However, you should still refrain from sex when one or both of you are having an active outbreak. Also, suppressive therapy might help in reducing the number and frequency of outbreaks. If you friend has not tried daily Valtrex (or Acyclovir or Famvir) as suppressive therapy, he might be pleasantly surprised by the results.

I would send him the link to our website at: http://www.datingwithherpes.org where he can read up on more current information on herpes. His fear of spreading it - even to someone who already has it - seems strange unless he's getting information from a misinformed doctor. Links to much better and more recent information can be found on our website.

Good Luck!

DWH